Find Happiness today !

today..I collected of all happiness tips for everyone who lost it !

How to find happiness today ...

Why bother the pursuit of happiness, when we can find it every day?

    "Happiness is the absence of the pursuit of happiness.  Chuang Tzu.

The happiness is certainly a subject that fascinates me and I like to pause and reflect. After speaking of the 6 scientific ways to find happiness , I want to talk of everyday happiness, or of the happiness that you can and should rediscover ... today.

We often think that to achieve our goals will make us happy, so we want more money, more promotions, more relationships, more .... Sometimes, however, happen to achieve these goals and realize that deep down we are not so happy, that happiness, like the horizon, has moved away again. So, let's go back to lower his head nell'affannosa run an unattainable goal, like hamsters trapped in the wheel.

I always thought that if I had not enjoyed the trip, the goal would have lost much of its charm. This led me to seek daily small moments of happiness. If you share this thought, here's 4 ways to create happiness and positive emotions every day, starting from today ...:

    Relax. Learn to carve out a small space daily to relax your mind and your body. Techniques such as biofeedback , the meditation , yoga etc.. are extraordinary relaxation methods. activities But sometimes suffice with less high-sounding names, but equally effective: Read a good book, prepare a special dish and enjoy it slowly, watching the latest episode of your favorite show, have a drink with friends ever, etc..

    Choose. Most of the time we are convinced that external events are the cause of our state of mind. This is so obvious, how ... fake. There are events external to determine the way you feel, but it is the modoin you choose to read and interpret them to make you feel good or bad. But this is saying a sea of banality! Yes, maybe, but ... it is from ' application of concepts often "trivial", that we rediscover the essence of things. The next time you're down in the dumps, try to understand why and then ... take another little step: are you sure that what is happening to you has only negative effects?

    Have fun. There is nothing to do, there are things that we enjoy and the things that we are bored or worse, we weigh tremendously. Sometimes we can not help but take care of things that are not polite to us, but that does not mean that they should occupy the whole day. Find a hobby, find something that you enthusiasm, something that amuses you. Try to cultivate this passion on a daily basis, even for a few minutes a day. These few minutes will be a precious charge.

    Laugh. There is a strange connection between body and mind. If it is true that what we think affects how we feel physically, it is equally true that the way we act affects our thoughts. Anthony Robbins would say "emotions come from motion" (emotions stem from how we move), and it is not hard to believe. When our mood is not skyrocketing the fastest and most effective way to change it ... laugh. Laughing without a specific reason, for the pleasure of laughing laugh.

How do you create positive emotions in your day?

How to be happy:

Small gestures immediate to be happy.

    "The supreme happiness of life is to be loved for what you are, or rather, being loved in spite of what we are."   Victor Hugo

I believe that the pursuit of happiness is a long path, made ​​of big choices in life, but even small daily achievements.

Personally, I am still in search of happiness, but in the course of my life I have learned to recognize a few simple gestures that have transformed immediately my mood , giving me a sense of lightness, determination, invicibilità, euphoria, I love enclose the term: happiness.

Below I will talk to you about 3 immediate gestures, which to me have proven extremely effective in make me less worried and happier.

1. Confess something that you are ashamed
But how?! we live in a competitive society, where those who show the slightest sign of weakness is immediately outcast and you're telling me that I should confess to something that makes me naked?!

Yes Confess your fault, something that you are ashamed, takes away his power to your weakness.

Do not get me wrong, it's not confess to the whole world your deepest secrets would be stupid. You must carefully choose the person, or persons, to which you feel you confess your own weakness. They could be your parents, your partner or your closest friends.

Being able to be with these people completely yourself, without having to pretend or simulate what you are not, give you an immediate sense of intense happiness.

Not only that. Confess something that you are ashamed to people you care about, it is a great tool for personal growth : from this moment on you will be responsible, not only in front of yourself, but also in front of people special to you, every step of that will accomplish to improve yourself, to overcome your weaknesses and achieve your goals .

2. Helps someone who does not know
Have you ever wondered why almost no one refuses to give indications to a traveler a bit 'confused?!

Simple: it makes you feel good.

But what is it that makes you feel really good about this small gesture? tries to guess ... he's right! is the profit that makes you feel happy.

Here is a more practical and immediate action to be happy: it helps someone who does not know, so unconditional, that is, without expecting anything in return.

Take advantage of the opportunities that happen every day:

    Offer someone to sit in your place on the bus / tram / metro.

    Leave spend at the supermarket checkout that guy who only has a shampoo in hand (me!).

    Help the little old lady at the post office to fill out this form.

In the English-speaking world have coined the term: Random Act of Kindness (RAK: Random acts of kindness); Italians us that we have nothing to learn from the Anglo-Saxons call it simply ... courtesy.

3. Tackle something that scares you
We come to the last of the 3 gestures that give immediate happiness tackles your own fear .

Do you find it difficult to think that having to do something that scares you can make you happy? well .. you might be surprised.

Try this little practical exercise:

    Make an ordered list of 5 things that scare you the most, starting with the most terrifying.

    Get the last thing you wrote and imagine a gesture, even small, that you can take to deal with this fear (are you afraid of flying? Limited time to catch the bus to the airport).

    Ask yourself the goal of making this small gesture within the next 3 days. I recommend it is important not to procrastinate !

    Close your eyes and ... GO!

Overcoming this challenge will make you enthusiastic small. Now think about how you will feel after you pass all 5 fears written on your package ... you're imagining? you ... pure happiness.


Happiness is not a utopia, but an emotion that we live every day, applying methods that have been scientifically proven to be effective.

    "There is a path to happiness. Happiness is the path. "

    Wayne Dyer.

For decades, the guru of personal growth they promised to reveal the formula of happiness. But in recent years, books, more or less serious, dealing with techniques and strategies to be happy, were added to real scientific studies. If the ' University of Pennsylvania has established an undergraduate course on happiness, the University of Edinburgh has gone further: scholars A. Weiss and TC Bates, in their treatise " Happiness Is a Personal (ity) Thing , "have identified the factors that determine our happiness.

Happiness depends on:

    50% of our genes. So, caring parents that you choose! ;-)

    's 8-10% by exogenous factors, such as money, social status, physical appearance, etc..

    the remaining 40% ... (drum roll) ... depends on YOU.

It is exact, 40% of your happiness depends on the way you think and face life. Unfortunately we can not change our genes, and in this article I do not want talked about how to improve your finances or how to become a master of interpersonal relationships ; I will instead propose 6 scientific ways to exploit the 40% of happiness that depends only on yourself:

1. Find a purpose in life

In ancient Greece, the concept of happiness was expressed by the term eudaimonia, which can be literally translated as "to be with a good demon" you understand 'These old devils of the Greeks! Actually the term demon (daimon) indicates a spirit guide, or destiny ... a purpose.

Dr. Martin Seligman, founder of Positive Psychology - a new branch of psychology that studies what makes people realized, enthusiastic and happy - recently said that the only way to find true and lasting happiness is to: identify our strengths, our skills, and leverage them to achieve ambitious goals. I in my little I have done a pretty good idea on how to find the purpose of my life .

2. Rediscover the simple pleasures of life

To find true happiness, you must not expect to reach your goals: you can have it today.

One of the practical exercises used by scholars of Positive Psychology is the method of "re-engineering of the day." This experiment is expected that participants describe in detail the activities of their day. The next day, covering their diary, the participants have to give a vote to the individual assets.

At this point, the method of "re-engineering of the day" expected that participants will replace at least 1 hour of unpleasant activities with 1 hour dedicated to the small pleasures of life . The results of the study group have shown that this small change in your daily routine can have a significant impact on the overall level of happiness.

3. Go with the flow

I took advantage of the title of one of the most beautiful compositions by Giovanni Allevi (" Go with the flow ", in fact), to talk to the 3rd scientific method to find true happiness. The term "flow" was coined by American psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (Mario Rossi, was not it easier?) To describe the state in which you are completely absorbed in the activity that is going on, so much to lose track of time.

Sometimes you achieve this state of total immersion ... singing, reading a book that we are passionate about or working on a project important to us. Our happiness is directly related to the ability to live more and more often these moments of complete immersion and the only way to do that is to identify what we are passionate about and put it at the center of our lives.

4. Choose your reactions

Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is a leading expert in Positive Psychology. One of his courses at Harvard University is dedicated to "reactions". From his studies shows that there are external events to determine the well-being of individuals, but rather their ability to react properly to these events.

While it is true that life is ruled by randomness and you can not choose the events that happen to you, it is also true that you always have control over your reaction.

5. Learn to give

An interesting experiment at the Harvard Business School has shown that spending money on others makes you happier than spending it on themselves. During the study of the HBS, the group of participants was divided into 2 classes: the first class was asked to spend an amount, at its option, for themselves; the second class, however, was asked to spend an amount, at its option, to other people. All individuals of the second class showed higher levels of happiness than participants of the first class; also individuals who had given more to others had proved even more happy.

Because I've told you this unique experiment? Simple ... to remind you that if you want to be happy ... you have to make me a donation ! ;-) Seriously, give to others ... and I speak not only of money but also of time, effort and love, is one of the more immediate actions to be happy .

6. Stop telling yourself "just when ..."

You keep telling yourself that you're only happy when ... you'll get that promotion, you will win the lottery, you will meet your true love, etc..? Well ... you've just sentenced to 'eternal misery! Tie your happiness to future events will create dissatisfaction and it is wrong for at least 2 reasons: a) we tend to overestimate the impact of events on our lives, b) once the event occurred so desired, after a brief period of euphoria, our level of happiness will come back in the media; is the effect of the so-called '"hedonic adaptation."

Many (and I include myself there) think that they will be happier when they have more money. But scientific studies clearly demonstrate that this is a false belief. If it is true that there is a difference between having no money and being able to meet their own needs, it is equally true that the rate of happiness remains virtually unchanged if we earn € 50,000 / year or € 500,000 / year. Just ... passed a minimum level of income, money is not the most impact on our happiness.

Try this little experiment practical: it transforms "I'll be happy when ..." to "I am happy now because ...".

And now you have no excuse: you have to be happy ... it's science!

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The difference between pleasure and happiness
That is why the pursuit of pleasure does not lead to happiness, but the pursuit of happiness can be traced through the pleasure

"The pleasure can be derived from illusion, but happiness is derived solely from reality."

Sebastien-Roch Nicolas De Chamfort.


In the last week, passed in Tuscany for a corporate training event, I have often had occasion to think about the difference between pleasure and happiness.

More and more often I find it hard to believe the lie that wants happiness and pleasure synonyms. Increasingly known false assumptions that they would like the pleasure at the base of happiness. More and more often I realize that we choose pleasure at the expense of happiness.

Doctor, now there is nothing to do, we lost: Andrea became an ascetic new age! ;-)

No, do not worry, this article has little to do with spirituality and everything to do with the choices we make every day. Choices that lead us to seek pleasure or happiness.

The pursuit of pleasure

I firmly believe that the pleasure to be part of our every day . We are "designed" to seek pleasure and avoid pain: it is written in our DNA.

But the pleasure addictive. We are obsessed with the pursuit of pleasure.

We need to buy more, drink more, eat more, to always push the bar of transgression. What pleasure it gave us yesterday, today we get bored. What we are excited yesterday, today leaves us indifferent.

Soft music can help !

Pleasure is a flame that devours us. Each time the flame goes out, the cold seizes us and we are willing to burn anything to try that feeling of warmth.

The pleasure is easy and under our control. Pleasure can be bought and should not be captured. The pleasure is immediate and should not be built.

But the feeling of pleasure is always an end and as a lover spiteful leaves us naked and bewildered. Assailed by remorse we promise to change life habits will change and will stop procrastinating ... at least until the next moment of pleasure.

The pursuit of happiness

Every day we are bombarded by the false promise that our next pleasure will make us happy; and maybe we find ourselves ...

    "Spending money that we do not have earned, to buy things they do not want, to impress people we do not like."    Will Rogers

But the paradox is that the search for true happiness has little or nothing to do with the pursuit of pleasure. You do not have to read a blog to realize it. Suffice it to think of the last time you were really happy.

If pleasure forces us to continuously add things that we do not need, happiness, on the contrary, it feeds of ' essentiality , we are happy when we focus on the things that really matter, when we share simple moments with special people, when we savor the present without worrying about the past or the future.

Happiness is water that refreshes us. When we immerse ourselves in happiness perceive reality in a different way and we shrug off the anxiety of chasing pleasure.

Happiness is never easy to reach and often have to pay the price of ' self-discipline and will power . Happiness can not be bought, but must be won. Happiness is never immediate, but we can appreciate the fruits already on the way.

If it is true that the pursuit of pleasure almost never leads to happiness, is it still possible to turn the pleasure into a practical tool for the pursuit of happiness.

Use the pleasure to find happiness

Continuing to reflect on the difference between pleasure and happiness have come to an interesting conclusion: the pleasure is the means and happiness is the goal.

That's the "trick" to make pleasant actions that will make us happy in the long term.

the motivation , self-discipline and willpower are excellent tools to achieve their goals and happiness, but we do not have infinite reserves; is much more efficient to use the pleasure.

Try this simple exercise to find out how to use pleasure in the pursuit of happiness:

    Make a list of actions and activities that will contribute most to your happiness and your well-being in the coming years, but inevitably you're procrastinating. The gym? Your dream? Write without thinking too much.

    For each task, try to imagine 5 ways not usual to see them through. Think of the example of physical activity: how can you make it fun and enjoyable? Maybe finding a sport that you're passionate about, rather than lock you up in the gym, or maybe you just need a training partner. Use your imagination.

    For each of the business test to experiment with new ways, until you have found the most enjoyable ever.

Pleasure can be the right tool to be leveraged to achieve your goals.

And you?  At this time in your life you are seeking pleasure or happiness?

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The Alphabet of Happiness
"The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely themselves."
Chuck Palahniuk

Last week we saw how to live happily helpful comply with the Law of the Garbage Truck . Sometimes, though, all these laws, rules, and good rules are likely to suffocate. As human beings we need to express our uniqueness and to do that we have to live by our rules.

For this reason, today I decided to offer you a different kind of post, a post in which I trace the many reflections on personal growth that we have done over the years, but especially a post that may help you find your way to happiness. To do this I decided to create an Alphabet of Happiness: for each of the 21 letters of the Italian I tied a simple word, a word to improve yourself, a word to reach your goals more ambitious, a word to be happy.

Choose your word, if you like, share it in the comments , but above all put into practice his message. If you can choose your words carefully, you'll have at your side a powerful weapon with which to face life's obstacles and achieve your goals. Do you want to discover together the Alphabet of Happiness? ;-)

for Happiness ...

    A as Akrasia. Do you remember the ' Akrasia ? In greek indicates the weakness of will know exactly what to do but do not have enough determination to do it. Do you find that to move forward by inertia along the path of least resistance. Remember, happiness does not fall from the clouds: you andartela to win, fighting every day against the Akrasia.

    B as Beecher. The 'self-esteem is one of the key ingredients and made ​​to feel happy. Without a good deal of confidence in ourselves, no goal will be within our reach. He knows something our friend Henry Ward Beecher.

    C as Growth. Happiness and growth are two sides of the same coin. When we let go and stop investing in ourselves, each day becomes an exact replica of the previous day. We find that properties in a cell that we built with our own hands. Get a pickaxe and break those walls that imprison you: foul choosing to grow every day, always a little step closer to your goals.

    D as the Decision. The decision comes from the Latin verb de-caedere, or "cut off": take a real decision therefore means eliminating all other options and focus 100% on that one choice. Many of us, however, decide not to decide: we are afraid to cut us the opportunity and we prefer that the time or others to choose for us. Remember, happiness may be at a distance of a single decision, but that decision is up to you and you have to take now.

    And as Essential. Every day disperse our energy and our attention in a thousand streams: everything seems so important, interesting and urgent; and yet we arrive at the end of the day with a sense of frustration and the certainty of having thrown another day in the toilet (pardon my French). We are happy when we are able to leave behind all that is superfluous to focus on ' essential .

    F as a butterfly. We are deeply convinced that if life was easier for us, we would be finally happy. We see problems as mortal enemies to be avoided at all costs. We take refuge in so ephemeral pleasures, under the illusion that these problems are resolved by themselves, as if by magic. But the story of the butterfly teaches us that the difficulties are our allies:

    "The difficulties are the tools that nature uses to make us stronger and worthy to realize our dreams."

    G is for Gratitude. When we are grateful, we are happy. If we pause for a moment to reflect on all that is positive in our lives, even in the darkest hour, be able to see a little light to cling with all our strength. Keep a daily gratitude journal is the easiest and most effective gesture to remind us every day why we can and should be happy.

    H as the Hagakure. L ' Hagakure (The Secret Book of the Samurai) is without doubt one of the books that have made my journey of personal growth. For years, every morning, I read a page of this book, each time finding the will and determination to face my days, to get closer to my goals and to chase my happiness.

    I like Start. We are always waiting for the perfect conditions and we always have an excuse not to start. Stop it with the mental saw, stop telling you excuses, stop making complicated what is simple. Do you want to achieve your goals and be happy? Simply begin.

    L as Reading. I've already explained in the past why you should read 52 books a year . Reading makes us happy. Curling up new worlds and new possibilities, but mostly we discover those talents that lie within us. Read more. Read anywhere. Read more.

    M is for Motivation. Have you ever seen a happy person ... and demotivated? No, me neither. Motivation is the fuel that makes us go on our way to happiness. But not to stay dry, we must learn to refuel whenever we need it. My secret to always have the right motivation? The aphorisms. Here are my 10 aphorisms favorite for when I'm unloading.

    

 Although as N. Their dreams and their own happiness when everything is running smoothly is easy; but the real difference between those who make their dreams come true and who puts them away in a drawer is the ability to continue to pursue them in spite of everything and everyone. Who you choose to be?

   

 Or Objective. Do not get me wrong, kid yourself that you will be happy only after realizing your goal is more wrong than you think. A Goal, with the "O" in capitals, is that goal that makes you happy while you are creating. Stop chasing the goals of your parents, your friends or company: choose goals that are truly yours and, in the meantime, learn to enjoy the " cup of coffee ".

   

 P is for Procrastination. André, and enough 'is procrastination! It's not like parsley that you have to put everywhere! What the hell to do with happiness?! Try to answer with a sentence in which I am very fond of: 

    "If TODAY you are not living your dreams is because you have decided to postpone YESTERDAY TOMORROW."

    Q as Quiedora. You can not find happiness in the past, much less in the future. True happiness is only here and now . Past and future are only mental constructs: this is the only remnant of the fact that we have available. If you want that your happiness is real and not imaginary, learn to cultivate it in the present moment.

    

 R is for Resilience. Life is often full of traumatic events, events that make us forget the taste of happiness. As much as we wish we will never have control over these events, but we will always have the ability to choose our response. If you want to learn how to cope positively to these events, we have to cultivate our resilience .

     

S as Studio. André, I'm sorry, but if you put the words happiness and study in the same article is likely to create a space-time paradox! Actually the study and continuous learning is the basis of a full and happy life. But if you want to study love, you must learn how to study effectively .

     

T is for Time. Have you ever thought? When things go wrong, time is always an issue and you do not have time, or the time you've wasted time never passes. But when you're happy the concept of time disappears. The paradox is that if you want to get rid of the time, you must first learn how to handle it .

    

U such Act. You will never be happy chasing the other. Happiness comes the affirmation of our uniqueness. Do not hide in fear of not being accepted by the other: learn to fully express yourself.

     

V for Value. Interview 10 people and 9 will tell you that to be happier, they would like more money. Having more money does not automatically make you happier; create value for others, to contribute, to do something that has an impact, yes that can really make you happy. And you know the height? Create more value and generate more money. Stop looking for ways to make easy money: focused on how to create something of real value to others.

     

Z for Zorro. When I was a child, Zorro was without a doubt one of my favorite heroes. I still remember when, during the carnival, put on his black cloak, a dark mask, a plastic sword and you felt happy and invincible. Then you grow up, exchange the mask of Zorro with as many invisible forms, which seeks to celarti to others; but you feel unhappy and vulnerable. I am still searching for the secret of happiness, and these 21 words are my small contribution to continue this research together, and yet, every time you drop the mask, whenever I can show what they are really, I feel happy. Have you ever tried it?

I hope that the idea of 'Alphabet of Happiness you enjoyed. If you have not already done so, choose the word that comes closest to your definition of happiness, let it mature in your mind, but above all ... put it into practice every day. Have a great week.

Hope you enjoy  it ….. Thanks !
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